You’ve tried horoscopes and gypsies. Financial planners and Harvard economists. And yet none of them have been able to accurately predict the future. My only question is this: Why didn’t you come to me sooner? Columnists have been accurately predicting the future since cavemen first wore mullets. It’s kind of what we do. So,...
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It’s so crazy, it just might work. The brand-new Guelph Centre for Innovation was announced this month with a lofty goal from the chamber of commerce of creating 250 start-up companies in the next three years. While your first reaction might be that someone has had too much rum and eggnog to make a...
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Ah, Christmas. Can’t you just hear the sleigh bells ringing and that distinct sound of Visa and MasterCard executives lighting their cigars with $100 bills? Yes. It’s that special time of year when we forget the recent recession, ignore our growing debt loads and head off to the mall to spend like it’s our...
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When I heard about the hard times facing our beloved Christmas tree industry, I did what any good, patriotic consumer would do. I bought two trees. I just wish I could say it was on purpose. I know, I know, what about global warming and all that – but you could consider this my...
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Dear Friend, The Guelph Squirrel Literacy Foundation needs your help. Can you find it in your heart to give generously? It’s almost Christmas, after all. We can’t tell you exactly what we do, because it’s all very complicated. But it’s very important. So send your money now! If you were sucked in by that...
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It’s way, way too early to be awake. The sun hasn’t even crested the horizon and I’m lying in bed, a blink away from a really nice dream, hammering the snooze button with a closed fist. As the radio DJ squawks on about something, it hits me: Why does this little plastic machine, with...
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“Those nerds are a threat to our way of life,” jock Stan Gable declared in the 1984 hit movie, Revenge of the Nerds. Seems we’ve been agreeing with Gable ever since. Let’s face it: we’re anti-nerd. They’re just not our kind of people. University of Waterloo professor Donna Strickland hears this distinctly North American...
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Turns out, I’m old. Specifically, I turned 30. Yes, you could say I should have seen it coming.  Firstly, the birthdays were always counting upwards. Secondly, I’ve been strangely drawn to Matlock reruns lately. Then, one day this month, I hobbled out of bed and that was it – I was old. The signs...
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Our parliamentarians made great strides in accountability this fall. They gave us… grand totals? Bending to criticism that the $143 million of taxpayers’ money our MPs spend each year on food, hotels, furniture and political flyers ought to be public, the House of Commons has released expense reports that finally removes the veil of...
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Early Sunday morning, after most Halloween parties had died down, two young men decided to do something really stupid. They took a step ladder and went creeping around Guelph’ McCrae House in the dark. After finding they couldn’t break in, they took what they could carry from the outside the building – a replica...
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