Guelph Mercury, 09/02/09 Just a short jog from the heart of downtown, in an overgrown, vacant lot near the Speed River, a tiny little battle is brewing. OK, it’s hardly a battle at all, more like a scuffle, but it’s just the kind of thing you’d expect in a city where some people don’t...
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Guelph Mercury, 08/26/09 Of course. Just when you thought things were right in the world again. It seems the folks at the Wikimedia Foundation, which govern one of the planet’s most popular websites, Wikipedia – perhaps you’ve heard of it – are putting an end to the party. The San Francisco-based non-profit, which started...
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Guelph Mercury, 08/19/09 See ball. Swing. Pop. Groan. Repeat. I’ve been playing baseball since I was shorter than the bat, but this is new. ‘This’ is that sudden, awful, painful sensation in my shoulder, the one that causes that popping sound. It comes with every swing now, announcing like a trumpet blast what I...
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Guelph Mercury, 12/08/09 Prepare for the occupation! I’ll bring the lemonade. Forget the Hanlon Creek Business Park protestors and their sleepover in the woods. That’s old news. Tomorrow night, residents concerned about the city’s plans to cut back Goldie Mill Park to make way for an expanded parking lot for 10-year-old violinists will meet...
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Guelph Mercury, 05/08/09 I’m sure the Jefferson salamander is a remarkable little creature. But I’ll bet $20 even it’s not cute enough to rally a city around a 675-acre plot of land that most of us have never set foot on. So it goes without saying the well-intentioned folks who packed a Guelph courtroom...
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Guelph Mercury, 29/07/09 What are you looking at me for? Nothing to see here – just a wayward columnist walking barefoot into a fancy downtown hair salon, like some homeless gypsy blown in by the wind. Nothing unusual about that. At least there wasn’t anything especially unusual about it – until he returns twenty...
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Guelph Mercury, 22/07/09 Mankind has made a lot of wonderful things – the wheel, single malt scotch, the push-up bra. But his most perfect invention just might be the humble hot dog. Yes. It is probably nature’s perfect food, with a little help from man. Step aside bananas or eggs or whatever imposter makes...
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Guelph Mercury, 7/15/09 What a funny little colony this is. Earlier this month, a breathless Canadian Press reporter stated in complete seriousness that a spokesperson for Stephen Harper insists “the prime minister did not pocket a communal wafer given to him at a funeral.” She was referring to the, er, uproar, over a video...
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Guelph Mercury, 7/08/09 Right in the middle of Ontario’s corn belt, little Wyoming is so flat it seems you could smack a high fly ball to centre field and watch it soar forever. It’s here in this tiny farming village, right off Broadway Street, you’ll find an increasingly rare sight: Prime green space in...
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Finally, some good news involving those rats with puffy tails that terrorize southern Ontario. This appeared in the Waterloo Region Record Monday: Transformer zaps squirrel GuelphMercury.com – News – Transformer zaps squirrel Kitchener – About 1,200 households in the south end of Kitchener were without power for 42 minutes yesterday after a squirrel was...
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