Standing up to the farmers’ market

April 29, 2013

They come with their strollers and their reusable sacks, looking for local produce and adorable handicrafts. And they’ll stop at nothing to get them.

For too long, Guelph’s Farmers’ Market crowds have been terrorizing law-abiding citizens like you and I, running roughshod over neighbourhoods in their search for in-season vegetables, specialty meats and fresh baked goods.

They don’t care about the rules. They don’t care about decency. They’re even a threat to public safety.

So thank goodness some brave citizens are finally speaking out. When it was announced that the popular farmers’ market would be temporarily moved to the Exhibition Park Arena while its current site undergoes renovations, some residents stood up and declared, “Not in my backyard.”

The farmers’ market will only bring cars and — my heavens — people to the Exhibition Park area this summer, they cried. And they’ll be there every Saturday morning, from June 15 to Aug. 31. That’s like five hours every week.

Nothing good will come out of that, I guarantee it. It will be traffic chaos. There will be vehicles in the streets. People will be parking against the curbs and in the lot outside the arena. Think of the noise, think of the bicycles, think of all those rustling hemp sacks. What do they think this is, some kind of urban area?

If you’re like me, you probably moved to the city to get away from crowds and cars. So understandably, it’s quite perturbing when those irritations follow you right into your neighbourhood, even if it’s only for a few months in the summer.

How many times have you been going for a pleasant morning nap in the street and some car comes along and ruins it all? We’ve all been there.

It’s fine for the farmers’ market to do its sinful business out of sight, away from our neighbourhoods. We’ve tolerated its traffic since 1827 in our fair city, even when they were selling livestock. But this time, dear readers, they’ve gone too far.

The problem goes all the way back to that shifty troublemaker, John Galt, who made plans for a city market the very moment he established Guelph 186 years ago. It was, it turns out, just a giant scheme designed to drive up prices for the farmland the Canada Company was trying to sell in the area. How devious.

Are you going to trust anything created by a guy who was sent back to Great Britain by his bosses because he was a lousy accountant? What, he was too cheap to buy a calculator?

Of course you’re not. And still, the scheming has carried on to this day.

We all know what really goes on inside those old horse barns of the provincial winter fair. Sure, their honey may taste sweet, their pies may be mouth-watering and their flowers may look pretty. But it’s not right. It just isn’t. Can’t these people just buy their food from China, like the rest of us?

And don’t let the polite Mennonite girls with their little doughnut machine fool you. They’re plotting something, you can just tell.

This whole shameful summer market plan has bad news written all over it.

Couldn’t they move the city market to a place where people actually want to see traffic, like Fergus? Up there, they’re just glad when anyone with a car comes to visit.

Guelph Mercury, April 27

One Response to Standing up to the farmers’ market

  1. consulting marketplace on October 17, 2013 at 2:33 pm

    Enjoyable read. like the point of view.

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